An open letter

Dear Sir or Madam,

This letter is in response to your correspondence (undated) stating: "You could be our lucky winner!!" It is quite a puzzle to me why you would choose to inform me of this most obvious of facts. "You could be our lucky winner!!" Well, yes, I suppose I could be. I could also get run over by a cement truck. Or be abducted by a gang of kidnappers who hold me hostage for seven months. Or combust spontaneously. In fact, the possibilities are endless. Me being a winner (and a lucky winner, no less) is merely one of them. No need to get all excited about it.
When discussing my reception of your epistle with my neighbor, he surprised me by producing a letter from your company providing the exact same information to him! He explained that these letters are sent by the thousands! So not only do you state the bloody obvious, you also do so to a large amount of people! I think you could have saved yourself a lot of postage stamps by refraining from the endeavor altogether. It would definitely save me and many others from a cumbersome and annoying two minutes which could have been spent more wisely.

Hoping you will refrain from such eccentric behavior in the future,
Yours sincerely,
cronopio.

PS You could be hearing from my lawyer soon.